The Story of Random Events
by I love Ferrari California's
Summary: When Bella attents Forks High School for the first day, what conversations will she have in the parking lot with a 'stalker? Read on to find out; just be aware of randomness along the way! One shot..... Bella and Edward are VERY OOC! So beware!


Author's Note: I wrote this for my own entertainment and shouldn't be taken seriously

**Author's Note:** _I wrote this for my own entertainment and shouldn't be taken seriously. It's kind of pointless and __**really**__ random at some (most) parts. But I hope you enjoy it nonetheless!_

_**Chapter One**_

It was my first day of school at a _very _new school. Because Charlie had already left to frolic with bunnies and I was bored out of my mind, I decided to blow the joint.

As I drove through forest after forest, I was reminded that I no longer lived in Phoenix, Arizona. Suddenly, I could feel the waterworks coming on so I pulled my flashy new Bentley off of the road. Charlie had given it to me as a "welcome home" present. I'm not sure how he afforded it, but I was glad he could.

Anyways, as soon as the tires stopped, safely on the side of the road, I cried hysterically, having an emotional breakdown. After 5 minutes or so, I had a random coughing fit. Everything got better when the song 'Life's What You Make It' by the cheesy Barbie Hannah Montana come on the radio. Even though the song sucked, I was happy to hear it; Phil listened to it all the time!

When I finally pulled into the school parking lot, I immediately noticed a midnight blue Lamborghini.

_Pfft, _I though, _who wants a Lamborghini?_

Standing beside it, however, was a beautiful bronze-haired babe! He had a look or arrogance to him, and I so badly wanted to smack it off. _Or run into him with a car..._

The more I thought that, the faster I pushed my Bentley baby forward. _Let's see how much he likes……..THIS!_

Jest then, when I was about a meter away, I did a donut that Chuck Norris would be proud of!

"AH! I'm gonna die! EEEEEEEEEEE!" the jerkasaurus squealed, sounding more girly that Mark from Ugly Betty.

As smoke came from the tires, I got out of the car alluringly, like the do in those James Bond movies. Taking my new, dark red Gucci sunglasses off in slo-mo, I made my first step from the car. My outfit, which consisted of Tight, black leather pants paired with a matching black leather jacket revealing a black tee-shirt in which the name 'Chanel' was written in little rhinestones with the logo underneath, and to finish the look off, a pair of knee-high cowboy boots; the same color as the sunglasses. The best part, though, was my little plastic water gun that I pretended to blow smoke out of. I wonder how many cows I killed with this outfit.

"I see that I've given you a scare?" I drawled out in a fake Southern accent.

"What the………" the dude stuttered.

"That's right, darlin'," I said, again in my beauteous accent. "You better be scared, 'cause you mamma's eating potato chips right now and you're just standin' here! And they're barbecue, too! My fave! So go get them!"

"What the hell, Bella?"

Huh? How did he know my name?

"Are you a stalker? Gosh golly!"

_Who could this person be? I didn't know anyone is Forks. So how could this creep possibly know my name? _Very_ stalkerish. _

"No, you idiot! I'm not a stalker! I'm—"

"_Eddie! _What are you doing here? I thought you moved to Antarctica because your brother Emmett kept on singing _My Heart Will Go On _by Celine Dion! Did he find you?" I asked, now with a heavy French accent.

"Yes, Bella-boo, he did. Isn't it absolutely _tragic?_ How will I _ever _go on?" Edward asked desperately.

"No idea, Eddiekins, but I'm going deep sea fishing tomorrow at 2 in the morning. Meet me at Stanford's Ice Cream for some ice cream, and we'll hack onto a boat in no time! So whaddaya say?" I asked with my new Italian accent.

"Frickin' count me in!" Eddie replied like a Valley Girl.

"Yay!"

After that, I got bored of my Bentley and begged Charlie for a black and red Bugatti Veynon, the most expensive car in the world. And then I called Wal-Mart to tell them to call Staples and tell _Staples _to reserve a pocket planner with carrots on it for me. And then I can finally track down FBI agents that are undercover, and invite them to my crayon party with lots of pink stuffed animals and popcorn! I can't wait!

And then I can take over the world with my hissing peaches and binoculars! Woo-hoo!

**Author's Note: **_Haha. I know, that was completely pointless, but it was fun to write. So review? Please? You know you want to!_


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